1984年1月31日 星期二
Jon 出生在 New Jersey 的 Englewood Hospital
在那個時代懷孕的媽媽基本上不太照超音波
除非有醫療上的需要
在我懷孕四五個月的時候因為有些小狀況
所以照了第一次超音波
知道我們即將迎來一個男寶寶
我和joe在超市買了一本嬰兒姓名大全
看到"Jonathan"這個名字
意思是"Given of God"
上天給的禮物
就決定做為我們第一個孩子的英文名字
至於他的中文名則由他的爺爺奶奶決定
一歲的jon已經要準備做哥哥了
現在想想
兩個孩子年紀差的很近
好處是可以一起長大
感情會特別好
辛苦的是大的那一個
因為小小年紀就要做大哥哥
其實才年長一歲多
還是個小小孩呢
jon從小就很老成
不知是不是這個關係
兩歲的生日在家中請了爺爺奶奶阿公阿婆過來一起慶祝
這個時期的jon常常生病
台北潮濕寒冷的冬天
讓他和弟弟輪流得細小支氣管炎
再嚴重變成氣喘
進出醫院是家常便飯
我常自嘆命苦
兩個兒子如此難帶
害得我都不太記得他們健康時的可愛模樣
好在日後在美國時間多了
自然而然就不藥而癒
等到現在回想起來
兩個兒子帶給我的"折磨"僅此而已
因為他們從小到大不論唸書交友做事
從來沒有讓我操過心
即使青春期也沒有任何讓我煩心的事
他們小的時候常生病也就沒什麼大不了了
三歲生日在麥當勞開了一個小小生日派對
堂姐steph 表哥tim 在旁讓他很高興
四歲生日在New Jersey的大姑姑家
Carvel 的小熊冰淇淋蛋糕是他們的最愛
五歲生日和弟弟到台北的兒童樂園慶祝
六歲生日在爺爺奶奶家
阿公阿婆也來齊歡聚
七歲生日在New Jersey家附近的一間Gym開party
有大姐姐帶著Jon還有他同班的小朋友們一起做體操
八歲的 Jon在後院練習揮棒
在幼稚園時愛上了洋基隊的一壘手Don Mattingly
從此開啟了鐵桿洋基迷的生涯
他自己也從初中開始就一直打棒球校隊直到高中畢業
九歲的生日派對
請了同班的男生同學們
在紐澤西家附近的一間棒球練習場
揮棒慶祝生日
十歲的他拿著這個美式橄欖球擺pose
之後沒有多少年
在10和11年級的時候
Jon在lawrenceville的連續兩年house football賽事中
成了主力戰將
十一歲的jon是個小胖子
住在香港5年
造就了他愛吃廣東菜的習性
十二歲的生日
在我們'愛都'的家
那裏有他們兄弟倆美好的童年記憶
十三歲的jon長成一個小帥哥
到西安旅遊留影
十四歲的生日和大媽在台北一起過
jon和joe的大嫂農曆生日是同一天
臘月二十九
十五歲的生日在New Jersey大姑姑家
離開家去上寄宿學校之後的第一個生日
十六歲的生日還是在大姑姑家
不喜歡離開家的jon
那些年多虧有大姑姑
讓他在假日時有地方可去
這個時期的jon還有一個怪異舉動
他把自己的頭髮幾乎全部剃光
只留前額邊緣一小撮
旁人覺得怪裡怪氣的
他卻很得意自己發明的新髮型
jon的青春期完全沒有任何叛逆行徑
大概在頂上作怪就是他的極限了
十七歲生日那天是正常上課時間
晚上我和joe到學校接出兄弟二人加上他們的表弟ted
到學校附近的mall
在eatery吃個簡便晚餐再送他們回校
記得那天很冷
但是我們每一個人的心中都是暖洋洋的
十八歲的他即將告別高中
結束他很不喜歡的寄宿學校生活
十九歲的他是位大學新鮮人
二十歲的jon談了一段戀愛
過程雖然不盡如意
但是仍然很感激那位女孩
讓他變成熟了
也讓他清晰的知道
何種特質的女孩子將是他未來人生中的伴侶
二十一歲的他在北京大學做交換學生整整一年
所以很難得的可以常回台北
和爺爺奶奶阿公阿婆多相聚
二十二歲的jon大學畢業後直接去上研究所
二十三歲年輕氣盛的模樣
二十四歲的他
是家中同一個輩份中第一個拿到碩士學位的
剛畢業就碰上2008年的金融海嘯
尋職不易
jon沒有怨言沒有氣餒
皇天不負苦心人
終於如願的定居在Boston
二十五歲的jon是位勤奮的上班族
二十六歲的他已經是一位思想成熟完全獨立自主的年輕人
這張相片很能夠表達他的心境
弟弟ken和兩位乾妹妹
興奮飛躍在他的身旁
jon則如老僧入定般的不受外界影響
自己的未來要走甚麼路
他都自有規劃
二十七歲的Jon完成了終身大事
從他很小很小的時候開始
"家"在他的心中就佔據著最重要的地位
成家之後
他心中的"家"更廣泛更有意義了
二十八歲的jon
是我和joe的好兒子
是ken的好哥哥
是claire的好丈夫
二十九歲的生日
claire人在北京
我和joe決定到Boston陪他過
晚餐jon請我們在城裡吃義大利餐
回到家
拿出點著一根蠟燭的小蛋糕
為我們這位最貼心的兒子唱生日快樂歌
今天三十歲的jon
即將迎來第一個孩子
要做父親了
我知道也確信
jon會是一位非常成功的爸爸
三個月大
和
三十歲的jon
三十而立的今天
家已成 業已立
我和joe都心存感恩
joe寫了一段話送給jon
做為他30歲的生日禮物
中國人說30而立，40不惑，50知天命，60而耳順，70而隨心所欲！
今天是你30生日。現在你不但成家，立業，今年更要做爸爸了（人生最重要，最美好，也最神聖的事情）。
爸一直以來都引你為榮，你負責，有EQ，一直是我們的好兒子。現在你又是一位好丈夫，(同時你也娶了個好太太）。爸相信你定會建立起一個充滿愛及相互關心的小家庭。因為家是最重要的。（如同爺爺及阿公對家庭的付出）。
爸願你們一切順利，平安，喜樂。要永遠保持一顆善良，並願意助人的心！尤其是和唯一的弟弟ken，爸希望你們倆個家庭能相知，相愛，相助。並延續于陳倆家美好的傳統。
祝我心愛的兒子，生日快樂！心想事成！主內平安！
下面是jon給我們的回信
Dad, mom, Ken, Claire,
Dad, thanks for the letter. I feel very blessed to have had a safe and happy 30 years. I don't think turning 30 has really hit me yet just like how I don't think that having a kid has really hit me either. I have been lucky enough throughout my life where a little bit of effort was always rewarded. Thanks to you guys, I have never wanted for anything and never felt I was disadvantaged in any way, materially or emotionally. As I get a chance to reflect on this today, I realize that turning 30 really is kind of different compared to 20 or 25. Up until this point in my life, the road ahead was always laid out in front of me. Go to school, go to college, get a job, etc. Over the past few years, I have started getting a taste of the rest of my life and the responsibilities I will bear.
I think the turning point in the last couple of years was moving to Boston. In doing so, I was leaving the school environment and facing challenges by myself. These last 5 years have been a struggle in a lot of ways but also a learning experience. I think that Claire and I had to learn how to deal with challenges and obstacles by ourselves in a city where we had little support. I really needed these years to build my own character to become more independent and strong. I guess all things happen for a reason and I needed Boston to help me grow.
These last few years have also been a dress rehearsal for what I consider the next stage in my life. I am excited and nervous about the impending arrival of xiaoxiao. I know that I will love and cherish every moment I have with my kids since they will one day need to go out and live their own lives. I have always loved you guys both and knew the sacrifices you gave for Ken and me. But on the eve of having my own kids, I think I'm starting to fully understand and grasp the magnitude of the love and sacrifice required to provide a similar family environment for them. I am lucky in that I have so many great examples of family figures in my own life. Each person chooses their own path but 爷爷奶奶，阿公阿婆, despite their shortcomings have been great role models for me. You guys have also taught me so much about the kind of family I want to have. I was telling Claire that our kids will be born winning the lottery with parents, grandparents and uncles/aunts that all love them so much.
Finally, 30 而立. That's something that I think I've moved towards the past few years. I still have many many shortcomings like my laziness and lack of confidence in some areas. But I think one of the greatest lessons 爷爷 taught me was the picking of our names. 修身，齐家，治国，平天下. Although that's a little different from 家齐国治邦宁, it is what has stuck in my head since the first days at Lawrenceville. I thought that you do each one and then move to the next. But little did I realize that the point of growing up and maturing is to take on more and not merely move on. For the longest time, I thought how can I 齐家 when I wasn't even strong enough myself. But I have realized that I will always need to better myself even as I start taking responsibilities for my family. One day, when I become more successful and start influencing the greater community, I will always need to remember the first two. 爷爷 and 阿公 are the perfect role models to show the lengths they went to help others. I will remember that as I continue to move on in my life.
So 30, in a lot of ways it's just a number. At the same time, I think it is important for me to stop, ponder, and most importantly thank the people who have helped me turn into the person I am today.
Thank you dad for showing me how to be selfless. Despite your temper, you are the most giving person I know. To be honest, I don't think I will treat my kids as selflessly as you have treated Ken and me.
Thank you mom for pushing us but always giving us an escape route in case we were in need. You pushed us to try, fail and try again. But I think algebra in 5th grade was a little too early...
Thank you Ken for always being there for me no matter how differently we think and act. I honestly think you take after dad in your selflessness towards family and friends. I'm very proud to have you as a brother.
Thank you Claire for putting up with me and loving me through all our ups and downs. Now we will need to do the same for xiaoxiao, texiao and chaoxiao! haha.
弟弟ken送給哥哥的禮物之中有著這幅相框
上面寫著
30 Years of Memories
Best Friend, Role Model
Happy Birthday!
January 31st, 2014
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